Protocol Snow

How I went from Apple store newbie to lifetime ban in one week

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I had planned on reviewing the iPad in my next post, but instead I’ll dedicate this entry to my photo below and an incident that happened today. Review of the iPad coming soon.
(UPDATE: now posted)

Apple ipad tablet slate shopping

As was correctly guessed, those iPads in the photo are not for me. When Apple delayed the international iPad launch by a month, early adopters worldwide started to panic. Since my nearby Apple store initially had plenty of stock, I offered to purchase and ship iPads internationally for members of the NeoGAF gaming forum. I was doing this as a favor, unlike hoarders who were unloading iPads on eBay to cash in on the $150+ markup. Instead, my asking prices were very reasonable, just enough to cover all the tax, international express shipping, and Paypal fees with a little left over for unexpected costs.

So as the pick-up requests came in, I went on multiple visits to the Apple store, buying no more than 2 per day since I had heard there was a limit per person. I found this whole situation pretty funny considering I had never bought an Apple product prior to this madness (the iPod Touch I use at work was given to me by my medical school). But the store recently went completely out of stock. I had one last order to fulfill so an employee helped me place a reservation. A few days passed and yesterday I was sent an email notifying that my reserved iPad had come in. The story begins here…

Apple store

I walk into the store today and ask somebody where I can pick up my iPad reservation. He notes my name and says he’ll be back, going behind closed doors to the stockroom.

I take advantage of this opportunity to place another iPad reservation using a store PowerBook. There are a couple more NeoGAF people considering a purchase, but they haven’t paid me yet. Oh well, by the time this reservation comes in, one of them should have made up his mind and sent payment.

But drats, reservations are limited to one per iTunes account. Luckily I have a second account so I used that to place the reservation. No sweat.

The employee emerges a few minutes later with the iPad and I hand over my credit card. If you’ve never been to an Apple store before, instead of checking customers out at a register, the employees use hand-held credit card terminals to ring up purchases. Adds to the hip factor, I suppose.

Apple ipad tablet slate shopping genius bar store

But instead of using his handheld device, he walks to the back of the store where the “Genius Bar” is. Naught a word spoken. There are registers here but this area is used mainly for technical support. I follow the guy there. He still hasn’t said anything to me. He gives my credit card to one of the staff there and says, “I want you to help me ring up this purchase.”

Guy #2 (looking at the handheld terminal) — “Why don’t you just use that?”

Guy #1 — “I need to check the card for… uh, pre-authorization.”

Guy #2 — “Ok.”

He swipes my card and they click around for about half a minute while looking at their monitor and whispering. Meanwhile, I’m standing on the other side of the Genius Bar, only half paying attention to these two guys. Instead I was curiously watching an employee ask a girl what she loves most about Apple.

Guy #2 (murmuring) — “…yeah, the 14th.”

My attention snaps back when I catch this snippet. April 14th was my last trip to the Apple store, and I had bought 2 iPads that day. When I walked to the Genius Bar, I hadn’t suspected anything out of the ordinary. But now I suddenly realize I will not be walking out of here with an iPad today.

Guy #1 says to Guy #2 — “Hold on, I’ll be right back” and disappears to the stockroom again. Guy #2 is still clicking around, not looking at me.

Me (nonchalantly) — “Is there an issue?”

He’s still staring at his monitor and a few seconds pass before Guy #2 carefully says, “There is a limit to the number of iPads that customers can buy.”

Me (playing dumb) — “Oh, is that right? What’s the limit?”

Guy #2 — “Only 2 per customer.”

Apple ipad tablet slate shopping genius bar store

Ok, so the gig is up. I stand around waiting for a bit and was preparing to leave when Guy #1 returns.

Guy #1 — “I’m sorry sir, but you have reached your lifetime limit of iPad purchases and will not be allowed to buy any more.”

Me (anticipating that statement) — “Is the iPad limit per person? Per credit card? Per household?”

Guy #1 — “All I can say is that you have reached your lifetime limit.”

Me — “What does that mean? Can I use a different credit card to buy it? I’m buying this for a friend.”

Guy #1 — “You are not allowed to buy this iPad.”

Me — “Uhh… is it ok if I have a family member or friend come to buy it for me? My reservation doesn’t expire until 6:00 PM.”

Guy #1 — “All I can say is that you have reached your lifetime limit.”

Me (suddenly realizing what he’s saying) — “Wait, what? Lifetime? What does that mean?”

Guy #1 — “All I can say is that you have reached your lifetime limit of iPads and will not be allowed to buy any more.”

Me — “I’m banned from buying iPads? I know there’s a shortage right now, but I can’t buy any more once there’s plenty of stock?”

Guy #1 — “All I can say is that you have reached your lifetime limit.”

I pause and look at him with incredulity undoubtedly written all over my face. Everybody tells me I have the worst poker face. Hey asshole, nice job with the passive aggressiveness, but who do you think you’re talking to? I’m from Los Angeles; nobody does passive-aggressive like we do!

Me — “Ok buddy, I’m not going to make a scene so I’m leaving. How many iPads is the limit by the way?”

Guy #1 — “That information is not available.”

Me (looking at Guy #2, who has been silent this whole time) — “He tells me that the limit is two.”

Guy #1 — “I wish I could say but I do not have that information.”

Me — “I’ve already purchased more than 2 iPads. Why didn’t anybody else stop me in the past?”

Guy #1 — “I wish I could say but I do not have that information.”

Me — “Alright, I’ve had enough. Have a good day.”

The icing on the cake? When I came home, I found an email from Apple waiting for me. It was an update about my reservation, the one I had placed today in the store using my 2nd account!

Apple ipad tablet slate shopping genius bar store

Ban complete.

APPENDIX: Many people have been emailing me to ask how much I charged people. While I had previously decided not to give any concrete numbers, I also didn’t anticipate the wide interest in my story. For full disclosure, here are the specific figures:

A 16 GB iPad model retails for U.S. $499. My initial asking price was U.S. $650. This price includes all my additional charges: sales tax, 2 day USPS international express shipping, insurance, and Paypal credit card fees. All customs duty was properly declared.

This initial price was based on a shipping cost which I had estimated myself. Once I actually shipped the first package out and knew the actual USPS shipping cost, I refunded $20 to my buyers and lowered my price to U.S. $630.

The other models were priced the same way.

In summary, 16 GB for $630, 32 GB for $740, 64 GB for $850.

How is this different from eBay markup? eBay auctions add additional shipping costs and fees on top of the final auction value ($150-$200 above retail last I checked).

I bought 5 iPads total. You can do whatever calculation you want to figure out my “big-time profits”. I’ll save you the time: it was negligible.

Was it worth all that effort driving around after long days working at the hospital? Financially, no. But 5 diehard Apple fans in countries around the world are now very happy and spreading the iPad love to friends and co-workers, who would not have seen the iPad in person for a month at the very minimum. A couple of them have requested that I buy a few more iPads for their friends. I had to decline because… well, Apple banned me.

Apple storePhoto from Flickr. I don’t know his story, please don’t go flaming him.

Let’s play a game: how many sites will use this photo in connection with my story when they post about it, thinking these iPads are all mine? Just a little test to see if people actually read what I write instead of being sensationalists and grabbing only what they want to hear.

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Written by Protocol Snow

April 17th, 2010 at 4:51 pm

Posted in Gadgets, Pick-ups

  • taylor
  • ak47

    dude with that kind of service apple is gonna be sucking bill gates dick

  • ak47

    wtf that is complete bullshit bro by the time I'm 65 there will be at least 5 ipads that come out and if I'm rich(which im not)i just might want to by every new one for that year jesus christ what complete dickheads

  • Me

    Be happy you've got out so easy - in 100 years Apple deletes a part of your brain

    sorry this information is not available
    sorry .avi files cannot be played
    sorry you have to sync with itunes
    sorry you cannot connect to 2 PCs
    sorry you cannot print to an networkprinter
    ...

  • joshalfie

    You can connect to a network printer, you don't need to sync with iTunes although I don't see why you wouldn't want to, you can connect to 2 computers you just cannot sync but you don't need to sync anyway, avi files can be played (there's a multitude of free apps that can do it)...
    Nice try.

  • Andrew Kerr

    I can beat that, I went from apple store newbie to "lifetime limit of Iphones reached" in 7 hours yesterday....

  • Hasmik Araqelyan

    Who will give me a ipad????

  • Flynn Rabski

    Has apple said anything about this? WTF? I got here somehow, I typed "can you call a specific apple store" into google and the link to this was top half of the first page (i never click anything on the bottom or 2nd page). If I were a journalist I would definitely publish a story about this. Maybe they did. I bet if they did, you got your ban lifted. Actually, maybe not, because you were so open in this article. I'm curious if the regulations supplying only certain countries at certain time is by the corporation or by some other type of control (Government/Illuminati/FreeMasons), because you KNOW you got banned because you were selling them, AND you sold them to countries that WERE NOT ALLOWED to have it yet. We Americans get to have it first because we, along with select places in Europe/Asia, will be amongst the civilizations chosen to repopulate the world after the pole-shift this year (sometime between late 2012 and mid 2013). I'm just curious how big this monster earthquake is going to be. I mean the one outside of Japan was an 8.9 right? I bet we get like a 9.4. hHAHAHA you know how big a 9.4 is? everything near the fault will be obliterated. I'm pretty sure they said that a 10.0 is the end of human life, the beginning of the next Ice-Age. Sorry for running off on that tangent, I hope someone actually reads this. Love you world, SAVE YOUR GOLD! It will be the only thing that you can buy your life with! Because it is the only thing they will want... GOLD. Gold is needed to replenish their atmosphere which has not been replenished since its last arrival, over 3-Millennia ago. ANNUNAKI / THE NEPHILIM / THE FALLEN ANGELS they are documented on all your "ancient texts" that you hold as truth (the bible, curan, etc) they are just called by different names. When they return we will know who won the battle between them, and which type of humans will get to survive with their creators. I hope the Annunaki that created me won! I bet they did because I am white and I live in America. I'm sure they are the reason America exists and why America is the best. The Illuminati or the implementors of the "New World Order" / a single government control over the entire world, are trying to change that, they are trying to bring it back to Europe. The reason they do not want it to be America because America is West of Atlantis. Atlantis resides in between Europe and America in the Atlantic Ocean. It will surface again and be the land that connects America to Europe in the new landmass that is being created. I forget what its called but you can google and find it. It's not "Amasia". Amasia is what WOULD happen if the poles were not to shift. In that, America heads west across the Pacific and collides with Asia, but what WILL happen is quite the opposite. America will head the way it first came from, but not exactly. I've told you enough, if they found out who I was I would be screwed. Thankyou IP-blockers and fakers :)

    -Anonymous

  • Delia_pacaldo

    hi uontsw vrwque ndye hstiq dtaewpw bye twafdppw dw

  • AS

    1/2/3 would be fine between you and a few family / friends. When you start BULK exporting to your ENTIRE friends list, they've got to PREVENT you from buying anymore so that OTHER people who come into the STORE do not go EMPTY HANDED. 

    Its called being FAIR to ALL your CUSTOMERs.. and PREVENTING the Upcharging Scalpers/ Resellers and their BUY STOCK (Empty the SHOP) and RESELL. Its like Black Marketing TICKETS!

    And there are 1000s of them doing it all the time. So in some way I am glad Apple has such practices in place in the store and even in China / HK stores. 

  • lifetime limit, what a joke, as if its going to be available for a lifetime, apple really are up there own asses & although I love there products, my iphone & ipod I still would have liked to see them go bust back in the 90s

  • horsebot3000

    I freaking HATE when store employees talk to me like they are robots! Awful feeling, like I don't exist, aren't worthy of being spoken to like a human being. That is just horrible. I hope those employees felt like crap when they went home that day. Unbelievable.

  • horsebot3000

    The "lifetime ban" is silly, but the worst part is how they spoke to him. Drop the 1984 red-tape speak and treat people like PEOPLE. I actually like Apple, but that is just some weird cultish BS.

  • Daschlomo

    Thats Apple for you. If you were marking them up double, you could buy as many as you wanted. Its like ticket scalping, you want to take your kid to a baseball game but it's sold out because stub hub bought all the tickets and they're scalping them online. but if you had a ticket to a game you couldn't make and sold it to a friend for $5 more than face value because of service fees, then you're a criminal.

  • Jazzzz1

    This is much to-do about nothing. I'm glad you were banned from buying more iPads. The store policy applies to everyone...even people who live near the store. Good.

  • HoldenMonaro

    i would be proud to get a lifetime ban from apple. i think apple should ban every person on the planet.

  • ll

    Whenever you have a problem like that, in a store, you should call Apple headquarters.  

    I had a huge problem with a new Mac computer I bought that had a defective screen. I'd never bought a Mac before.  I went to two different Apple stores and neither manager would replace the defective computer.  They kept "fixing" the (new) computer but it continued to have the same problem.  Finally, I told one of them, I paid for a NEW perfect computer, that's what I should receive for this amount of money.  All I got for my trouble was that famous stonewalling and hipper-than-thou, it-must-be-your-fault attitude.  I kept backing down because, inexperienced, I thought, well, maybe it really was my fault, or my problem, or whatever.  It was so time consuming, too, I can't tell you!  Insane!   This went on for months.  Finally, in disgust, I tried to have my bank just credit my c.c. but it was past their 60-day limit for that kind of thing.  I called Apple  headquarters and after all those months of wrangling and endless visits to the store (and not having a working computer, in the meantime) I was authorized to receive a NEW computer, in ONE call.

  • SteveJobs

    A selfish act of greed.

  • Redbordeaux

    Agreed.  Idiot and trying to justify it with an air or innocence.  Medical School, right.  Like a doctor has time to but and ship dozens of ipads.  Lifetime ban from anything apple for all i'm concerned.  idiot.

  • jozza.net

    You told them to "Have a nice day"? Seriously? I would have told them to go f*** themselves. Apple stores are full of braindead, unhelpful, egotistic turds. Both in US and Australia. It's like they have some universal brainwashing scheme.

  • Jonathan

    Kudos to apple you deserve to be banned.

  • How about i break your fucking jaw.

  • Kingoftheearth21

    What I think is bullshit is that you can't use yahoo messenger without a cc or gift card even thou yahoo is NOT apple why the fuck do I need to give apple my #'s when I'm using yahoo. And anyway messenger is free wtf?????????

  • Zacharydfre@gmail.com

    haha i had a thing happen to me, just today. i took my dads credit card to buy a game on my XBL account...and he called and complaned that he made no such payment...and i downloaded the game. all fine and good. payed him his money back....this all happing like a month ago...and just today 9/6/2011 i get banned? i geuss they thought i was a hacker....haha lifes a bitch

  • JBS

    But Wait!! There will be another product Apple will develop and market! Gather all your friends; introduce them to your favorite Apple personnel as you all buy 2 of each. Pay your friends back right there in cash. Ship as you’d like, and make whatever money you want!! 

  • So funny

  • carrollstraus

    laissez faire economics anyone?

  • Drumandbassfiend

    Wow. this is quite a fucking wall o' text for some foreigner trying to take advantage of a constrained item. Way to buy all the iPads to send them to your chinaman friends douchebag while little johnny down the street has saved his allowance cutting grass to buy one and your overseas ass has already bought them all.

    write something with more sustenance, or go cry to your little asian friends in your hondas. fuckface.

  • spookie

    I don't think Apple's limits make any sense either, but they've had them since the original iPhone and have enforced them to the extent of not letting Steve Wozniak buy more than 2 iPhones, so this shouldn't have been news to you.  And really, you did make a profit.  If you'd charged EXACTLY what your costs were it wouldn't look so iffy.

  • Snap your credit card and order a new one.

    Problem solved.

  • Tex

    I know this is old, but your an idiot.

    Its just like concert tickets. Sorry die hard fans, you cant get Rolling Stone tickets because someones already purchased yours.

    Also telling someone that they have exceeded the amount allowed by one person to purchase an item is not the same as "Banning" someone. Someone plays too much World of Warcraft.

  • I wish could limit my customer to 2 purchases in a life time. I live apple products but the company management has gone insane.

  • Skatempls

    Damn

  • YO MAMA

    Was that the only Apple Store you bought iPads from? If so, go to another one. If they say you can't buy one, tell your friend (or some random person on the street) to go.

  • lol

    <walks in="">-><goes elsewhere=""></goes></walks>

  • Holly

    To be fair, iPads are in limited stock but I think a lifetime ban is a bit over the top. The way the apple staff treated you was appalling; you should respect them and them you.

  • Sandy

    I am completely disappointed with Apple Store. We ordered a 2010 Christmas present MacBoob Pro) for our eldest son, who will be graduating high school soon this coming year. This is a major expense for us but we figure that is also a wise investment.

    Apple separated the shipment into 3 parts and invoiced our bank account (we used our bank card to pay) for four payments (.53 cents, $1171.00, $289.55, and $1171.53). Yes indeed, Apple Store charged us twice for the same amount. We promptly called our bank, Wells Fargo, and had to file a claim for the double-charge. Wells Fargo informed us that this claim could take up to 30 days to resolve. This does not help us much given that our mortgage payment is due in seven days. Merry Christmas to us from Steve Jobs.

    Next, we called the customer support line at Apple Store. We’ve now made five calls to the Apple Store customer disservice clowns with no resolution. What’s funny, in a very bad way, is how they just spew out the same robotic corporate telemarketer rhetoric, and do not get anything resolved. We are told that the double-charge “should” drop off in the next 30 days. Well, Steve Jobs, we need this money for our mortgage payment that is due in seven days.

    We consider ourselves as savvy and experienced, long-time internet shoppers. We have never had a problems like this. Given this low, low quality of customer service, it is amazing that Apple Store is still in business. We will never do business with Apple Store again. Now we need to go and find some funds to cover our mortgage until our double-charge from Apple Store is reversed.

  • Aidan

    Can't you just buy iPads at bestbuy? futureshop?

  • gogreenmaureen

    It's a wonderful story. That's what our country is all about. Helping people. So you made a small profit. I would add more but I think you see where I'm going. As far as apple I'd like to see their profit margin. And all the big CEO's too.
    lol Rationed iPads. I couldn't resist.

  • Andrewilllee

    If those workers weren't Asian, I would just put the racist excuse on them... or I would just cause a scene. lol

  • Ahmed Ali

    i have seen your site.i like all material which you have added in it.i want your help to increase my business and in the promotion of my site named newinapple.com

    http://newinapple.com/

    [Ipad-Iphone-Ipod-MacBook]

  • Orange

    I've read every single word of your story, and I agree that you're a complete moron.

  • Fraserabrown

    After reading that very involved post that could probably have been about 6 sentences to the same effect, all i could take from it was this
    a) the shop assistant was nervous about telling you this, he understands it's sort of bullshit.
    b) you were totally rude to them and were probably making wildly irrational and uninformed arguments
    c) they don't care about you, and .5 minutes later they have probably forgotten.
    d) this is petty, does the world really need this on page 1 google results?

  • No

    Same story here, but the employee just recognized me from the day before. For me the limit was reached with just 2 iPhones! The employee asked me if I already bought an iPhone and I said yes. I could've just said no..

  • Poultry, PCs and Macs

    Re: Free technical support for Macs: My ASUS notebook had a little problem with the LCD recently. A big grey box spanning the height of the screen; I think it was as a result of me carelessly putting it in my bookbag (I go to a University to learn things). Called their tech support. They don't have a genius bar, so they PAID to ship my laptop across state lines and had it repaired and returned within the month (did I mention it was free?)
    I notice a lot of people saying that you pay for this, you pay for that, whether you realize it or not. You pay for everything without your consent. It's called profit. If it costs Apple x amount of dollars to keep their Genius Bars up and running, then, in turn, your laptop costs a lot of money to keep it all working. It's cyclical. That's life. I would say that nothing you do will change things such as that, but someone will get sociological on my ass and say that of course, we have control. Whatever.

    Re: Mac vs. other operating systems in general- I'm running Windows 7 right now on my Asus notebook. LOVE the computer. great graphics, screen, speakers.. it was built to be a gaming machine, and I am satisfied as such. But Windows 7 came too soon, and it doesn't function very well with my webcam, and my laptop weighs around 9 lbs. and the battery life on Power Saver is fifteen minutes less of two hours. I could buy another battery, but that would mean turning my laptop off in a lecture hall to replace the battery and then I'd miss what the professor is saying. So, in turn, I'm looking at buying a MacBook Pro 13" to sustain my need for a lightweight computer with great battery life. You could call me a PC turned hybrid; I use a Mac Mini at work and the thing freezes up occasionally. Nothing's perfect. I wish it was, but I'm fine with that.
    As long as we have money, we'll buy things. As long as we buy things, we'll argue their finer points over other things.
    I bought some chicken tenderloins at the store because they were cheap and looked like they'd do what I wanted them to do. They ended up being completely disgusting. I will stick with the slightly more expensive chicken breasts now- they are more filling, cook better and worth the money.
    (Did I just say that I like Macs over PCs? Oh, wait, no, chicken tenderloins are just disgusting.)
    Just wanted to throw this out there and possibly get some responses.

  • Gauravahuja

    its because of fuckers like you that skew the supply demand by buying things nobody asked you for that people like me that saved long and hard to buy something have to wait out in the cold.

  • KundoKun

    I remember a Seinfeld episode, "The Nazi Soup". The situation is exactly like that. George Constanza was ban.

    This history is really funny for me. I'm living in Latin America, and stuff like that are really abnormal for us. Why an enterprise will refuse to sell!!??

    No more IPad for you!

  • Dustin_moritz

    lifetime ban? couldnt you just...take some money outta your card...drive across town and buy in cash?

  • lindakduong

    awww man...I'm sorry that totally sucks.

  • blabla

    Just what APPLE wants... banter of any kind! I read comments saying - "PC" and "MAC/APPLE". no one has mentioned any of the other "PC" brands...

    So whos the winner... The large corporation who brand is promoted FREE! (APPLE you win!).